Hi my Nick

Good morning "Son"shine,
I love you babe and miss you.
Just wanted to say hi and good morning before getting out the door today. I want to quit smoking son and it has been so very difficult this time. I am gonna put the patches on again, that is how I quit for 4 years before Shelby's passing away. I pray to God I can do it again!!!
I have some other personal thoughts that I will share with you in my thoughts and prayers tonite. I am trying to trick my mind into wanting to do something that I loved doing before our tragedy of losing you and Shelby started. I am having such a hard time getting back to the things I love. I know you want moma to be happy and I know you and the saints are all praying for moma to HEAL and be WELL again.
My main focus really has been on being present for the kids, lloyd, and myself. Doing whats next and whats in front of me is my constant focus. I'm gonna do it Nick! Im gonna do it for me fisrt I have to then for our family!! I want to be well I want to heal and I want to be happy and enjoy life again. I don't want to be depressed and I am sure NOBODY that has gone through this wants to be. But I do know this Healing is a choice, and for today I am choosing to heal.
Yesterday I received a package in the mail. So, I opened it and inside was a beautiful rose quartz bracelet from one of my friends in Ca. It is so pretty. Rose quartz is "healing for the heart" how appropreiate that I would that day say to myself when I woke up, I want to be well and how am I going to do this and then the rose quartz comes in the mail. Thank you Alina:)
I'm on my way to health and wellness Nick.
I love you sweet boy and I miss you always. I will write you later my sweet Nick. I love you so much, I love you more and more and more forevermore ~moma~