Hi Nicholas James

I love you son. I miss you souch honey:( I still think about you constanly!!! I miss you I miss you I miss you:( Bad days, sad songs and moments by myself make your death more painful and more of a reality! I know you are gone....but I still can't accept it!!! Will I ever?aybe not! Maybe not!!! And as you know, I didn't have a bad day today! But a sad song did come on and I am by myself right now, and yes I am thinking of and missing you:( but I'm ok son. I go through my days without medication or any sort of mood altering substances...which makes it very REAL, very HARD, and very PAINFUL!!! I just can't believe you aren'ty sweet son!!! I love you and miss you so much.
I will write you later son. Kisses baby, lots of kisses to you.
I luv you more ~ Moma ~

I luv u babe

I miss you son...................
I miss you more than anyone knows...more than anyone could ever understand...more than Anyone, ever could!!! I miss you sweet boy, I miss you:( Everyday, every hour, every minute.
I luv u more ~ Moma~

Hi my son...

Hi sweet boy, I love you baby...I miss you!!!
Well I have finished my second week at work today, and it is good. I met with my boss and he gave me some things to go over this weekend that will allow me to learn more about the business and train for a better position. I am very excited about what God is doing in my life. It's good son, it's very good.
Thank you for the penny's all last week and this week. Always single penny's, I know they are from you:) it makes me smile and I thank you for that:) when I was mowing the lawn this evening I found the beautiful feather too. Half way through and there it was, all by itself!!! Thank son, it is beautiful too. It's been a while since you've given me a feather:)
Iet with the support group Tuesday and we had dinner, 3 Margarettas, it was nice to visit. I took Greg with me, he's such a handsome boy Nick. He's a good kid, you would be proud of him son...very.

Hi my son

Hi Beautiful Boy,
I love you baby...miss you unbelievably so!!! Today it has been 20 months since you died! Honestly Nick, writing the word "died" referring to you is still so painful and unbelievable!!! I think it will Always be unbelievable to me, but I am hoping that some day...it won't be ao painful:( I miss you Nicholas...I miss you so much. I wish I could hug you, kiss you, hear your voice, and talk to you! I wish I could take you to lunch at Red Robins, float the river with you, or invite you over for tacos and movies! I wish I wish I wish!!!
The cemeteries are enforcing the rules about leaving things there. Last week several of them removed everyones things, including your light and cherub. Maybe that's why Brandon told me to take home your turtle last month, he knew the rules would be enforced!!! I'm so glad he told me. So I use your turtle for our front door to prop it open on breezy days:) I guess I will create a beautiful garden here at home, and put all your beautiful " things" in it, along with your chimes and lots of beautiful glads!!! I'm gonna plant a beautiful tree first then build your garden.
I love you sweet son, we all miss your love, hugs, kisses and presence in our daily lives:( I miss you, I miss you!!! I will write you later my son. Kisses to you my love.
I luv you more ~ Moma ~

Happy Fathers Day Nicholas

Good Morning my Beautiful Boy,
I love you son and miss you so so so so so so very much!!! Happy Daddy"s Day from me to you sweet son:) I know you are celebrating it well with Shelby and the rest in heaven today!!! I wish you were here. Im going to your garden after me and the kids make Lloyd a Fathers Day Breakfast! I just need to get them out of bed..ugh!!! They went and bought a bunch of food and juice last might so they could serve their Dad breakfast in bed:)
I will write you later my beautiful boy. I miss you terribly, and days like this hurt me badly, they ate still nearly unbearable!!!
I luv u more ~ moma ~