I love you babe, I miss you so much, i still struggle with you being gone!!!
Tomorrow is Easter...Ugh another Holiday without you. Then Tuesday will be moma's 46th Birthday, and you wont be here to give me a hug and kiss and one of the beautiful cards you always picked out for me:( I miss miss all those things from YOU and so much more. With Greg and Journey's Birthdays just passing too it has been hard without you here, wishing them a Happy Birthday and seeing you hug them and bringing them some special gift that you would so carefully choose for each of them. they missed you like crazy on their Birthdays:(
I just wanted to tell you I miss you and love you so very much. Sending you hugs my son. Always in my heart and always on my mind...I miss you so.
I love you more ~moma~
Saturday, April 3, 2010
Friday, April 2, 2010
I love you sweet boy,
Hi my Beautiful Boy...I love you so much, and miss you horribly today.
Greg went to take his driving part of his test and he PASSED of course with flying colors, the instructor said he did very well and particularly with his parallel parking!!! I'm so proud of him:) I only wish "YOU" Nick were here to go for a ride with your lil brother in his car with his "new" very first license:( I know Greg is thinking something about you...not sure what, but I know he has thought of it, I feel it in my heart. I know he has thought I wish you were here Bro, to go for a ride with me!!! I will gently ask him if he has thought of that today to hopefully allow him to release the burden some and "TALK" about it "YOU"....he still doesn't do well "talking" about you! My heart is so happy for him...so happy, I wish you were to be with him on this special day, and everyday!!! My heart hurts for him, for that same reason!!!
We, me Lloyd, Greg, Journey, love and miss you so so very much!!! Every day moma misses you, not a day or probably an hour in a day goes by that I DON'T think of you, talk to you, cry for you, long for you, misssssssss you, love you! I still to this day say to myself.....I still can't believe your gone!!! I still can't believe you took your life baby...even though I know you were so very tormented!!! It is a very difficult thing to come to terms with! I suppose I may never really be ok with that, because it is not natural for our children to die before us, as you yourself experienced with Shelby, it is not normal...at all.
I miss you more than you could have ever known!!!
I will write you later, love mommy.
P.S. He should be back soon. I am so proud of him son, I know you are too. I will take a ride with him for the first time with his license, and then I will take one with him for you, okay? I know you two boys would be off and running all the day and night if you were here!!!
I love you more son, that's all I can write, right now:(
Wishing you were here....missing you for me, and for him (Greg).
Greg went to take his driving part of his test and he PASSED of course with flying colors, the instructor said he did very well and particularly with his parallel parking!!! I'm so proud of him:) I only wish "YOU" Nick were here to go for a ride with your lil brother in his car with his "new" very first license:( I know Greg is thinking something about you...not sure what, but I know he has thought of it, I feel it in my heart. I know he has thought I wish you were here Bro, to go for a ride with me!!! I will gently ask him if he has thought of that today to hopefully allow him to release the burden some and "TALK" about it "YOU"....he still doesn't do well "talking" about you! My heart is so happy for him...so happy, I wish you were to be with him on this special day, and everyday!!! My heart hurts for him, for that same reason!!!
We, me Lloyd, Greg, Journey, love and miss you so so very much!!! Every day moma misses you, not a day or probably an hour in a day goes by that I DON'T think of you, talk to you, cry for you, long for you, misssssssss you, love you! I still to this day say to myself.....I still can't believe your gone!!! I still can't believe you took your life baby...even though I know you were so very tormented!!! It is a very difficult thing to come to terms with! I suppose I may never really be ok with that, because it is not natural for our children to die before us, as you yourself experienced with Shelby, it is not normal...at all.
I miss you more than you could have ever known!!!
I will write you later, love mommy.
P.S. He should be back soon. I am so proud of him son, I know you are too. I will take a ride with him for the first time with his license, and then I will take one with him for you, okay? I know you two boys would be off and running all the day and night if you were here!!!
I love you more son, that's all I can write, right now:(
Wishing you were here....missing you for me, and for him (Greg).
Thursday, April 1, 2010
Hi baby,
I love you Nicholas and miss you madly!!!
Well, Greg is officially 16 and he is awesome Nick.
I need to run Greg over to Tri-City Battery to get his breaks done, he might take his driving test in his own car. I will write you in a bit son
I love you more ~moma~
Well, as it goes Nick, Greg's car needs more than just breaks, so we will get it put in the shop next week. He needs a few other things too, so we will have everything done at one time. Anyway, he has to park it until we get it in the shop next week. But he will have one nice ride, I will take a picture of it and send it your way, okay son? You would love it. He did good.
I will write later ~I love you more, moma~
Well, Greg is officially 16 and he is awesome Nick.
I need to run Greg over to Tri-City Battery to get his breaks done, he might take his driving test in his own car. I will write you in a bit son
I love you more ~moma~
Well, as it goes Nick, Greg's car needs more than just breaks, so we will get it put in the shop next week. He needs a few other things too, so we will have everything done at one time. Anyway, he has to park it until we get it in the shop next week. But he will have one nice ride, I will take a picture of it and send it your way, okay son? You would love it. He did good.
I will write later ~I love you more, moma~
Monday, March 29, 2010
Hi baby,
Greg turns 16 in about 10 minutes....wish you were here. He loves his new car. Here is your bro, he misses you like crazy son...we all do. Wish you were here He bought his first care tonight a 1992 Acura, it is sweet you would love it.
I miss you son and love you more than life it self. We had our last class tonight it was bittersweet but beautiful. I will write you later okay.
I love you more ~moma~
Sunday, March 28, 2010
Good Morning Son,
Hi baby, I miss you and I love you so much.
Well, I took Greg to the DOL and he passed his written portion of the test, so he is scheduled for his physical drive this Friday, then he will officially have a license and can drive himself and Journey to school. No more bus rides for them :) He is a great driver, if he can just remember to go the speed limit.
Journey goes to the DOL on Wed. to pick up her permit and starts drivers ed. on April 9th. WOW!!! I can hardly believe it Nick.
Last night a bunch of us went to Country Gentleman's for their birthdays, we had a great dinner and fun time. Then we got a few movies and came home. I fell asleep about 11 and slept this morning til 10, I was tired. Just been going and going, but getting a lot done.
Our home is almost done, I can hardly wait to get back into it. It's gonna be like having a whole new home. We will be having a yard sale in May, getting rid of a bunch of stuff, half I will be taking to the Goodwill though.
The kids and I have been going out to the property and raking leaves and cleaning the yard. This summer we will be planting lots of flowers and I am putting up the planter boxes you bought moma just before you left for Cali. I am gonna repaint them. The tulips on the end caps will be a pretty pink and the boxes will be a darker grey like the trim on the house, so it is gonna look so nice. Then I am gonna put pink flowers in the boxes, it will be pretty. I always thought pink and dark grey look good together. We are gonna paint the outside of our front door the same color grey so it will stand out.
Lloyd will be home soon, we miss him like crazy and he has been working everyday, 3 weeks straight without a day off.
As you know moma's birthday is the 6th, but we are gonna wait to have Daddy home to celebrate mine. I am having Gr&Gr Pielstick over for Easter dinner next Sunday, I will have D and his girlfriend over too.
Enough for now sweet boy. I have to go grocery shopping and look for a few shirts too. I will write you later son. I miss you always. Sending you hugs and kisses and more love than you could imagine. I have my last grief class tomorrow night. We are meeting at Howard Amon, then back to the class to light candles and visit. I brought a song and made copies of the words for everyone to follow along with. The song is "Who You'd Be Today" by Kenny Chesney!!! It's a beautiful song, and completely says what I think about you today. I miss you so:(
I love you more ~moma~
Well, I took Greg to the DOL and he passed his written portion of the test, so he is scheduled for his physical drive this Friday, then he will officially have a license and can drive himself and Journey to school. No more bus rides for them :) He is a great driver, if he can just remember to go the speed limit.
Journey goes to the DOL on Wed. to pick up her permit and starts drivers ed. on April 9th. WOW!!! I can hardly believe it Nick.
Last night a bunch of us went to Country Gentleman's for their birthdays, we had a great dinner and fun time. Then we got a few movies and came home. I fell asleep about 11 and slept this morning til 10, I was tired. Just been going and going, but getting a lot done.
Our home is almost done, I can hardly wait to get back into it. It's gonna be like having a whole new home. We will be having a yard sale in May, getting rid of a bunch of stuff, half I will be taking to the Goodwill though.
The kids and I have been going out to the property and raking leaves and cleaning the yard. This summer we will be planting lots of flowers and I am putting up the planter boxes you bought moma just before you left for Cali. I am gonna repaint them. The tulips on the end caps will be a pretty pink and the boxes will be a darker grey like the trim on the house, so it is gonna look so nice. Then I am gonna put pink flowers in the boxes, it will be pretty. I always thought pink and dark grey look good together. We are gonna paint the outside of our front door the same color grey so it will stand out.
Lloyd will be home soon, we miss him like crazy and he has been working everyday, 3 weeks straight without a day off.
As you know moma's birthday is the 6th, but we are gonna wait to have Daddy home to celebrate mine. I am having Gr&Gr Pielstick over for Easter dinner next Sunday, I will have D and his girlfriend over too.
Enough for now sweet boy. I have to go grocery shopping and look for a few shirts too. I will write you later son. I miss you always. Sending you hugs and kisses and more love than you could imagine. I have my last grief class tomorrow night. We are meeting at Howard Amon, then back to the class to light candles and visit. I brought a song and made copies of the words for everyone to follow along with. The song is "Who You'd Be Today" by Kenny Chesney!!! It's a beautiful song, and completely says what I think about you today. I miss you so:(
I love you more ~moma~
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