Hi my Beautiful Boy

Hi my Beautiful Boy,I love you son...I love you.Well, I kinda waited all day to see if my laptop would come around...but it never did! So, I am on our old pc, that always seems to work no matter what. I'm so glad because otherwise I wouldn't have been able to write you tonight. I guess it's time for a comp. dr to look at that HP again. It's only 2 years old. I shouldn't be having so many issues with it!!!Anyway, I had a Healthy Pantry party and it was awesome son. I love their food, it's delicious,cost effective and they are healthy. Greg and Journey actually love the food too:)I have been doing better son. I have kinda accepted the fact that you are gone physically. I have satisfied myself with this explanation. "One day son, I WILL SEE YOU AGAIN IN HEAVEN". I think about that everyday...I will see you again. I find comfort in that. Otherwise I can believe that it is all over and never again will I see you and be miserable until I die, because there is no hope or comfort in that. It doesn't mean I am not hurting, it only means it doesn't rule my days anymore. I have hope in believing I WILL see you again. I have no hope in this world or in my flesh, it promises NOTHING. But Christ promises for those who believe, we will see our loved ones again in heaven. I just miss you in my life Nick, I will always miss you in my life, until that day!!!I bet you are absolutely BEAUTIFUL!!!I cant even begin to imagine just how beautiful you are in GODS presence. I bet HIS angels are amazing. I know you are more than at peace where you are, you are experiencing joy, love, and eternal bliss with our heavenly Father.Nick, come see moma tonight in my dreams ok. I want to kiss you. I miss you babe. I miss you so very much.Journey just walked in from cheer, so I want to say hi to her and talk about her performance for a few. She loves cheer. She is amazing, I would say she is the best or at least 1 of the top 2 girls. I hear her coaches and other girls, they know they have a gem in Journey.Do you know that she got back into cheer right after you passed away and that it was the best thing for her at that time. I see it as a blessing now, but at first I didn't, but her focus was on doing well and being strong. So she put all her energy into it. I know it helped her through the first few months. She wore herself out, but it was a good thing. Her body in the past year has been transformed into an athlete's frame, she has a lot of muscle and she is ripped. We are still taking supplements, and that is a big part of it, they go hand in hand, workouts and supplements. She has the edge on every other girl there. I love that, and she is IN shape.I'm gonna say good night son. Sweet Dreams my sweet son. I miss you...I love you.
I love you more ~moma~